You probably wonder if you’re going crazy when one minute you want to hold your mate close, and the next you want to push them away.
Some days, all you want to do is curl up in bed and cry.
You’re probably having the same fights over and over, or worse, saying nothing to each other to avoid fighting.
The result? You feel isolated, afraid, and alone.
Maybe you want to feel the way you did on your wedding day, when the future was bright and you had everything to look forward to. You look at your partner, the person you love most in all the world, the person who promised to love, honor, and cherish you forever, and you wonder where that person who stood across from you at the altar on your wedding day went and how do you get them back.
You dream of reconnecting with your partner on a deeper, more intimate level than you are now, but the fear of being hurt again holds you back.
You want to go back to being best friends and lovers, but maybe your friends or family members are saying that you are crazy to forgive him, and they tell you, “once a cheater, always a cheater.” It doesn’t seem like there is anywhere for you to turn. All you want is to feel secure in your relationship again.
You want to go back to trusting and loving your partner the way you used to…
You want to go back to the couple that you used to be…
… but that seems impossible now with this affair hanging over your head.
You’ve seen it before with friends or work colleagues, when infidelity has devastated their lives. It was impossible for them to get through it.
Every day, when your partner leaves, you wonder where they are, what they are doing, and who they are talking to.
You’re so tired of the racing thoughts and the feeling that you must constantly check up on them to be sure they are where they’re supposed to be. You feel so tired and don’t know if you have it in you to keep this up for the rest of your life.
You can’t imagine allowing yourself to be vulnerable with them again after getting hurt so badly with their affair. How can the two of you ever reconnect?
Pain seems to be a constant companion, and you just want to feel better.
I know this is not how you want your life want to be right now…
You can come back from this stronger than you ever were before. It’s a journey that I am ready to take with you, if you both are ready to do the hard work of rebuilding the trust you used to have.
My only goal as your therapist is to focus on helping you and your partner understand how to give each other what you each need.
After the affair, it felt like you two couldn’t be further apart, and you wondered if you should just cut your losses and leave. With therapy, you can start to move through the pain and anger to build a foundation for a stronger marriage.
Together, we will try to understand why the affair happened. This is not to place blame but to be a safe place for both of you to feel heard and to help move toward understanding what happened.
You will learn to communicate with your partner in a way that brings a depth of understanding you never had before. You will both learn to feel comfortable asking for what you need. This deeper communication can lead to greater feelings of connection and happiness with your partner.
We will also work on rebuilding the trust that was shattered by working on honesty and relationship transparency. You will create a new marriage where you can both feel a sense of being in the marriage together.
Your marriage is in crisis mode, and it is so important to get help. Working with me can help you begin the healing process.
We’ll learn about your needs and recommend one of our specialized therapists.